


Non-Ideal Work Environment

by buttmaster



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Creepy robot consent issues, Death, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-21
Updated: 2014-04-21
Packaged: 2018-01-20 08:00:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1502825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttmaster/pseuds/buttmaster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The game was over. It'd been long over, in fact. The Condesce deposed (that was a nice way of putting it), the new Empress has begun enacting changes immediately. It was a rough start, to be sure. Change doesn't come fast, especially on a planetary level.</p><p>But this isn't about Feferi Peixes. This isn't about social change or sweeping declarations. About strangers returning home after sweeps spent away, or new trolls growing up in a world where the old ways are just a schoolfed history chapter on the Before Empress era. No, this is about two familiar losers, 16 sweeps old, living lives where land-hopping and grist-harvesting and murderclowns were no longer a thing (though, to be fair, murderclowns were most certainly a thing, still... they were just persecuted under the new laws and put into early moirail matching social services).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Non-Ideal Work Environment

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mahwaha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mahwaha/gifts).



The game was over. It'd been long over, in fact. The Condesce deposed (that was a nice way of putting it), the new Empress has begun enacting changes immediately. It was a rough start, to be sure. Change doesn't come fast, especially on a planetary level. The declaration was made that the hemospectrum meant nothing. Low-bloods and high-bloods were declared equal (even if low-bloods were biologically inferior... and after all, everyone was inferior to the Empress herself). There was no shame in being a mutant blood, and culling them was a thing of the past (officially, at least... mutant bloods for the most part still stayed anonymous, because while the ruler believed mutation wasn't an abomination that didn't mean all her subjects felt the same way). And the biggest change? Adults were no longer shipped off once adulthood was reached, and there were plans to begin opening the doors to those who wanted to return. Sure, this meant more attempts on the life of the Empress, but Feferi Peixes stuck with the plans. All in all, things were going well.

But this isn't about Feferi Peixes. This isn't about social change or sweeping declarations. About strangers returning home after sweeps spent away, or new trolls growing up in a world where the old ways are just a schoolfed history chapter on the Before Empress era. No, this is about two familiar losers, 16 sweeps old, living lives where land-hopping and grist-harvesting and murderclowns were no longer a thing (though, to be fair, murderclowns were most certainly a thing, still... they were just persecuted under the new laws and put into early moirail matching social services).

"You are late." Equius looked up from his worktable, tinkering with the grip pressure on the grabber portion of an industrial assemblybot. Equius had changed from his awkward teenaged days, for sure. He'd grown more muscular, which surprised no one... but he'd gained the motor control and the will to rein himself in a bit more when it came to his own strength. He had, after all, sweeps to get used to his own ability and power. As such, the sunglasses he currently owned had minimal cracks to the lenses. Also, he was not wearing them, as he'd come to realize that putting his vision in darkness... darkness obstructed by a bunch of fractures, made work rather difficult. His teeth, false as most of them were (thanks to Feferi's revamping of Alternia's healthcare system... if one can call invention revamping), were also minimally damaged. Escaping the ravages of puberty had also managed to regulate his perspiration, much to the relief of not only his hair but also his co-workers. The only thing that hadn't really changed was his atrocious taste in fashion.

"Clothe enough. Did I mith anything? I got thtuck in traffic." Sollux slung the messenger bag off his shoulder and dropped it on his own workstation. Sollux was a mystery, in terms of the body he grew into. He was skinny and lanky, all bones and points, angles everywhere. Fangs jutting out over his lower lip, chin coming down practically to a point. He had grown in height, with long legs and bony arms and elbows that were just everywhere. His spine was permanently curved from constantly being hunched over a keyboard for hours at a time. And yet, he had pudge. A pudgy chest, a slight paunch to his belly, even his thighs were just too big for his legs. And he still dressed like a nerd. Jeans and gaming shirts and a chain wallet, of all things. 3D glasses, but only because he was used to them at that point.

"What traffic? You walk here." Equius scowled, looking up from his work.

"Foot traffic. Why do I even need to be here anyway? I'm jutht going to be doing my own thtuff while I wait for you to finith up thothe adjuthtmenth."

"That is nonsense. We live in the same hivecluster. And not only that, but you can code the routines for grabbing and pressure necessity detection without the grabber being fully ready. You have the schematics. Don't be foolish."

"And have you been following the thchematicth?" Sollux cringed on that last word. What a shitty, shitty word.

"Yes. Of course."

"Okay, now anthwer me and don't lie thith time."

"Well, mostly. There were some... flaws. In the original design."

"Tho, what you're bathically thaying ith that I thould thit here and play tholitaire, then."

"Or you could try and make yourself useful."

"Nope. Roboticth ithn't my thing. Jutht like programming thure ath hell ithn't yourth." Sollux shot a smirk back at Equius as he slid his ace up to the top of the screen.

"Excuse me. Excuse me, Sollux. I will have you know I have built plenty of robotics by myself without anyone else doing the programming. Vriska Serket's arm..."

"Proththetic with manual nerve connecthion actheth and remote override."

"Tavros Nitram's legs..."

"Again, proththeticth."

"My robotic sparring partners."

"Glorified punching bagth, Equiuth. I'm thurprithed you even bother to put any innardth in them at all. And don't even bring up--"

"Aradiabot."

"No. Nope. No. Not talking about that. We are not."

"Is it because you know I'm right."

"No. That ith pretty much the exact oppothite reathon. It'th becauthe... one, the robot body didn't work how you intended it to whatthoever. I mean, the only thing you wanted it to do wath make her like you, and yet. Which bringth uth to point number two... it wath really fucking creepy."

"Language, Sollux."

"Fine. It was fiddlethticking creepy. Ith that better? Ignoring the fact that thhe wath my girlfriend."

"Was. That is the operative word. You two broke up."

"Becauthe Aradia died."

"Still."

"No. No thtill. How ith that thtill? Aradia died. I didn't dump her. What could I have done?"

"You could have built a robot, clearly." Equius sneered.

"I really dithlike you thometimeth."

"Oh, whatever will I do? The lowblood thinks poorly of me."

"When did you learn tharcathm? It'th not good on you."

Equius had been spending too much time online with his moirail and her... what did humans call it... boyfriend. Which wasn't quite a matesprit. But that was... fine, he supposed. "I learned it from your mother."

"What doeth that mean?"

So, some comebacks seemed to be species-specific. "It means please work on the programming needed. I can give you the updated blueprints now."

"E-mail them to me."

Equius was rustling papers. "I was just going to hand them to you."

"Why are they not digital copieth? Come on."

"Because I'm not good with the blueprint program. It is easier for me to just draw them out by hand." This was... a lie. The program was simple. But it was more fun to cover Sollux's desk in sprawling, unfolded documentation and diagrams. "You can scan it if you need to." The scanner was two floors up.

"You're impothible. Altho, Aradia wath a low blood too. Do you forget that when you dethide to get all hemothpectrum clathitht?"

"Yes, but Aradia isn't like the rest of you and your ilk."

"Did you for real jutht thay ilk?" Sollux stood up, legs creaking a bit, and sighed, heading for the door. "I beyond dithlike you."

"Yes, I heard you. Think about where we're going to eat after work. And please pick somewhere that serves salad."

Sollux flipped Equius off as he left the room. "Fiddlethickth you, EQ." Cluckbeast salad was still technically a salad, and the sauced and grilled meat cookery had a pretty good cluckbeast salad.


End file.
